Send Me to Hogwarts, Please

Everyday, I wait for my invitation. I wait for the owl to come and tell me what I already know. That I’m special. That I’m different.

That I’m a wizard.

I’m getting older, but I haven’t lost faith. How could they not invite me? How could I not be the biggest and best wizarding prospect in a generation?

Levitate a feather? I can levitate a whole car! I’ve tossed a car into the air, up up up, and down it came, with a crunch and a crash. But no explosion. They don’t explode like in the movies.

Transfiguration? Don’t make me laugh! I turned my little brother into a snake. He was crying about something I’d done to him and I thought, “What a little snake.” Then I turned him into one. It wasn’t fast, though. You could hear his bones burst and snap. He howled as his organs shrank and all the unnecessary bits dissolved with a hiss and a glub. Then he slithered away, the little snake.

I’ll admit, I cheat a bit at potions. I just throw whatever’s handy in a pot. Get it dark and bubbling and then I make someone come along and taste it. Last week it was Wendy from down the block. She didn’t turn into anything. She just suffocated and died. That’s why I need schooling, you see?

Really, it’s the dark arts where I excel. Torture is fun and killing is second nature, but there’s nothing quite like making people do what you want. It’s really the best of all worlds. You can make people torture and kill each other! And there’s always just enough light left in their eyes so you know they know what’s happening - they just can’t do anything about it.

Is it because I’m a muggle? I can’t help who my parents are, and besides, I’ve already punished them plenty for their underwhelming genetics.

Is it because this power isn’t mine? Well, that’s not fair at all. If summoning was easy, everyone would do it. Not just anyone can serve as the human vessel for The Eyeless Lord of Suffering, can they? Not just anyone can wield His strange and chaotic powers so effortlessly.

I’m as much a wizard as anyone. And I’m tired of waiting.

The next time you hear from me I’ll be a proud student of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Or there will be blood. And fire. And an endless, lightless void of madness and anguish and despair stretching across the weeping face of this dying, forsaken planet.

Wish me luck!

#Dark #Supernatural